Just taking in all this great discussion, thanks for all the great information - though I know it wasn't all for my benefit
Just wanted to check back in and let everyone know that we haven't had a SINGLE growl, nudge, or inappropriate behavior with my 4 year old since I started having the kids eat before her and control her food. I've also been more consistent with the door and NILF. I've been reminding the kids to have her either 'sit' or 'down' before petting her (which I have always done).
Interesting about the flooding discussion. We've been working on having her down/stay in front of high rabbit areas (we live in the desert, so rabbits are EVERYWHERE) and then recall her from down the street. I sort of took from Cesar Millan in this because she nearly was yanking me off the dog scooter daily with the rabbit situation... so I started trying to desensitize her to rabbits so I wouldn't die on the Diggler at 25MPH. We're about 6 months into it, and it's been a huge challenge... but "on by" is working much more consistently now after the desensitization process and making her down/stay for long periods of time in front of prey.
We're not hunters, we're more the running/camping/hiking type of family. So is "flooding" just used in relation to fear or anxiety responses in dogs? Why is desensitizing to cats/prey/rabbits any different?
Don't really need an answer, just thinking aloud. We got Isa as an adult rescue and never owned a dog before in my life, so all of this is new to me.